Have you ever found yourself engaged in self-sabotage? I have, recently in fact.
Paul talks about this in Romans 7 – “The good I will to do I do not do, and the evil I don’t want to do is what I do!”
This is evidence of what some call “limiting beliefs” – faulty beliefs that prevent us from living the life God intends for us. Do we really believe God is good and loves us immeasurably? That following God’s laws is the best way to live? The truth is we will never outperform our true beliefs.
This past year, 2015, was a challenging year for me. At this time last year, I identified eight goals for the year, and I stepped out to achieve greater things than I ever had before. I did not truly accomplish any of my goals, and it might seem like the past year was a failure. I discovered limiting beliefs I didn’t know I had!
However, it has been an incredible year of learning – about myself, about the process of building a business, about the value of my message and my skills, and about goal-setting. I identified the limiting beliefs, addressed them, replaced them with God’s truth, and moved forward.
I find myself now, at the beginning of 2016, in a position to move forward towards my goals more confidently and effectively than ever before.
In his book The 15 Invaluable Laws of Growth, John Maxwell describes eight “growth gaps.” As I describe each one, think about your own attitudes towards pursuing your dreams and living a life of significance. Are you holding on to any of these limiting beliefs?
The Assumption Gap – I will automatically grow
- As children we can’t help but grow and learn, but once we leave school, growth and learning is up to us.
The Knowledge Gap – I don’t know how to grow
- Everyone starts somewhere; recognize what you don’t know and look for the information you need
The Timing Gap – It’s not the right time to grow
- There will never be a “good time” to invest in yourself
The Mistake Gap – I am afraid of making mistakes
- You will make mistakes if you are learning and growing; experiment to find methods appropriate for you
The Perfection Gap – I have to find the best way before I start
- There is no one perfect way, only several possible ways; experiment to find the best way for you. People say, “Anything worth doing is worth doing well” but I believe anything worth doing is worth doing.
The Inspiration Gap – I don’t feel like growing
- Growth is uncomfortable; it’s easier to sit on sofa and watch tv! I believe it is Tony Robbins who said, “You will change when the pain of staying the same is greater than the pain of change.”
The Comparison Gap – Others are better than I
- No two journeys are ever the same; embrace your unique gifts, talents, skills, and experience
The Expectation Gap – I thought it would easier than this
- Anything worth accomplishing will require work and sacrifice.
This last gap is the one I am currently working through. I always thought that if God was leading me to do something, it would run smoothly. Unfortunately, in 2015 I did not find that to be the case!
John Maxwell gives a formula in his book that I feel I lived out in 2015: Preparation + Attitude + Opportunity + Action = Luck
Preparation: I didn’t know what I didn’t know; it was a year of learning and preparation for this year.
Attitude: It would have been easy to give up, and I did several times! However, I didn’t stay down, and I’ve learned to recover from disappointment more and more quickly.
Opportunity: Seek opportunities; Dale Carnegie said, “The man who grasps an opportunity as it is paraded before him, nine times out of ten makes a success, but the man who makes his own opportunities is, barring an accident, a sure-fire success.”
Action: Be proactive, try different things, meet new people, and see what you can discover.
Which of these “growth gaps” have you bought into?
For access to my tips for overcoming each of the growth gaps, check out my free video series!